shslanon | Chapter 2: (Ab)Normal Days

[frowns]

I don't understand why you protect Roma. Don't you think he decided by himself to go and work with Yuri? Do you... do you think...

[suddenly gains a bit of hope]

D-do you think he is only... ah, what is the word... pretending! Do you think he is only pretending to be on Yuri's side? You think he will maybe help us?

[had lowered his voice during those last sentences]

That would be good.

Who knows.

/but she doesn't look him in the eye when she says that/

I always hold out hope.

/but then, she does/

/maybe he isn't too dense to realize what she's just said with her body language/

But hope is valuable. It's better to keep it to yourself so others won't take it from you.

/and not too stupid to go around spreading what she's just insinuated/

[he really isn't one to catch small subtleties, but the significance of "keep it to yourself" isn't lost on even him]

...

Who can we trust? I don't know what to think and what to do. Tony seemed so friendly, but what do we really know about her? And she, here-- [nods down at Pidge]-- did she really kill her with a cold heart? Or was she scared? Did she feel as if she had no other way?

A-and it's the same for Roma - I was so angry at him before, and now I don't know what I should think. It is like you said: we cannot look into other people's heads.

[rubs his forehead]

If everybody can lie...

[suddenly thinks of his new fiancée - he was glad Maria didn't inquire about her again; surely nobody would understand why they became a couple in an instant, but now he is beginning to second-guess that development himself]

...

And... if even the ones who want only the best get too sad and scared...

[thinks of the dead boy who challenged Yuri, and of the small, frail one who despaired at Pidge at the trial]

How can we stop more people from killing and dying? I feel like I cannot do anything.

Don't kill anyone.

/pause/

We could stay in a group.

A group? Always?

[shifts a little and breaks eye contact]

...

[how can he to explain that always being together with others would be more stressful than being alone and vulnerable?]

Wouldn't be too hard. Bathroom might be the weird part. But it's not like we'd be hanging out, just keeping an eye on one another.

/sleeping room would be difficult/

Hm...

[frowns suddenly and looks down at the still girl]

...

[pulls her up a little and feels for her pulse at a different angle, then tries her wrist, then her throat again]

[looks at Maria]

/... oh/

/she looks down, then picks up her camera and takes a photo/

So she's... gone?

[nods]

Hm-m.

But let me be sure.

[lowers her onto her back and observes for a moment - no rise and fall of the chest]

[leans down and checks for heartbeat, breath, pulse again... but it has all stopped]

I think she really died.

[this isn't such a cruel way to go, all things considered]

/guess that means it's time to move her too/

/She gets up then leans down to grab and arm, and waits for him to do the same. She'll help again this time./

[surprised; he was ready to do it alone]

[gives her a small smile, then carefully carries the body into the elevator with her - at least this one is still soft and warm and feels more like a human than a thing, maybe that will make it easier for her]

...

[should it be strange that someone just died in his arms? perhaps, but she seems to be taking it in stride, too]

[besides he has seen much more violent deaths - but of course he can't tell any of the others about those; they wouldn't understand]

[still... the groaning of the wood as the trunk is severed from the root, the earth-shaking crash downwards, the breaking and snapping and splintering of branches, the revving of the saws as they get ready to dismember a being that was so old, so quiet, but always ready to listen...]

[frowns without noticing]

/She thinks it's just from carrying a dead body, and doesn't think on it much./

/This is the closest she's every gotten to death./

/Well, besides her grandfather dying when she was 4. But she was too young to remember much./

/The doors open and she silently helps him move Pidge to the freezer./

[opens the freezer with his free hand, then hesitates]

Should we...

[no, checking the body over again would be pointless - if there were any signs of life they would have noticed carrying her]

[shakes his head]

Ah... we can't do anything else, I think.

[helps her lay the body inside and observes the still corpses once more before closing the door]

...

Do you believe they can find out how Yuri and Roma killed those two? The-- the nerds, I mean?

Dunno. I don't think the short guy believes any of it.

/she goes over and washes her hands as if it will do any good/

He's delusional though.

/still washing her hands/

Delusional...

[frowns; he really hopes that boy isn't going to lose his head and kill somebody or get himself killed; he sure didn't seen to take the events well at all]

[but right now he is too tired to think about what they could do to prevent that]

[yawns]

U-uhn...

/she has no way to guess who's going to do what, and doesn't think about it/

It's late.

/she wants to shower and burn these clothes/

Come on, walk me back to my room?

[nods]

Hm-m.

[casts one more look at the closed freezer, then turns away and walks with her through the eerily lit corridor]

[he wants to shower too, but he feels like he might fall asleep before making it into his bathroom]

/they reach her room first and if he asks she'd let him in after looking at him like a two-headed snake/

Guess this is it. See you tomorrow? I'll try to think of a way to get everyone to stay together.

Okay.

[yawns again, but has the tact to cover his mouth this time]

[asking to come in doesn't even occur to him - everything is catching up with him now, and he has to constantly blink to keep himself awake]

Um, sleep well.

You too.

/she hesitates, then closes the door/

/and slides down to the floor on the other side of it, shaking/

/this sucks/

[walks to his own room - the tiredness made him forget about his plan to check on Lia -, enters and starts to undress because he needs a shower]

[suddenly feels drowsy, perhaps because he only had one small meal all day]

[sits down on the bed... maybe lying down for just a moment will help?]

[promptly falls asleep]

Chapter 2: (Ab)Normal Days

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